The Role of Relationships in Psychotherapy
The quality of the therapeutic relationship is one of the most consistent findings in psychotherapy research, across all treatment modalities. This demonstrates a correlation, not a cause: A good relationship can be just as much a result of incipient improvement as it is a prerequisite for it.
In TP, the relationship is more than just a prerequisite. It is the tool itself: Old relationship patterns are revived within it and can thus be worked through. Specifically, this happens during the sessions through Clarification and Interpretation. Recognizing these patterns without acting them out requires a high degree of self-awareness on the part of the therapist Self-Awareness.
Instead, the principle of abstinence applies. For a long time, aloofness or reserve were considered the correct interpretation of this principle. This view is outdated; in fact, it tended to be detrimental to treatment. Abstinence means that the therapist does not use the therapeutic relationship to satisfy his or her own needs. His or her interest and involvement may and should be evident.
It is inevitable—and even helpful—that he has his own feelings in this process, including anger, affection, and impatience. He uses these feelings to better understand his patients, without acting on them.
The relationship remains asymmetrical. It is not a friendship. It remains a working partnership with a clear mission, clear boundaries, and a clear division of roles. That is precisely what makes it secure.