Forgiving Infidelity: A Decision Only the Betrayed Can Make

Forgiveness is a choice, and it takes more than just time; hurt feelings don’t simply disappear on command. In the first few weeks after an affair, things look different. Images keep popping into your mind, whether in the middle of the day or at night. The desire to know every detail is strong, and every detail raises new questions. Staying and Leaving sometimes alternate within a single day.

What can be figured out on your own

Regardless of your partner, there are some things you can figure out for yourself: what has been hurt—trust, for example, one's own worth, the image of the relationship that had prevailed up to that point. This includes what the betrayed partner wants to regain and what is no longer possible, and sometimes also the question of what role they themselves played in creating the distance beforehand. One’s own role in creating the distance is one thing; the decision to be unfaithful is another. Anyone who confuses the two is taking on a debt owed by others.

Two questions, one order

Whether the relationship will continue is the second question. The first is whether the person who was cheated on will find their way back to themselves. If you want to sort through these issues, you can to the consultation session alone come.